Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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