fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
