Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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