I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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