remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
handjob tips. give me some.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
