Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
