My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
