Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
