And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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