so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize