My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
