Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize
