420 ftw
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
