Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
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