The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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