Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
