So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.