No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
she pinky promised me she was 18
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize
