Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
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