wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
