Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Randomize
