She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
you traded sex for a burrito?
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize