Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
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