Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Randomize