i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Randomize