Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize