dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize