called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Randomize
