I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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