Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
