am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Your dad touched me again.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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