I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
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