he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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