i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
