I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
zippers are such a cool invention
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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