is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
