Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize
