Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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