She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Randomize
