i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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