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this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize