i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
false alarm. still invincible.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize