when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
