We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
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Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
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WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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