I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
