"it" just moved
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
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She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
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You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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