the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
