I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
You had me at "let me see your balls"
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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