I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
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