Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
we're so committed to being not committed
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
