Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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